Thursday, August 16, 2007

Quantum Leaping?

Did you ever wish that you could leap into the next phase of your future just to see how life is turning out for you? Sometimes I dream so much bigger than I can really produce! I guess that's the "neurotic" part of the ADD'er that I am.

Today is the end of a 2.5 year chapter in my life! I knew this day was coming because I planned it, I planned it 2 weeks ago when I put in my notice of departure from this position. I guess you could say that it hit me when I took off my name tag and attached it to a piece of paper along with my door/cabinet/elevator keys to turn into HR.

I attended a seminar at the expense and request of the very county I've lived in nearly all my life some years ago, at the end of the 3-day conference, I was handed a beautiful pin that says, "I make a difference". When I took the position I just left, I pinned that pin to my badge so that I could remember to do all that I could to "make a difference".

When I was offered the position (that I left today), it felt like Heaven had opened up the pearly gates and let me in. They picked me, me with barely any respiratory experience, and only a respiratory education that was at the time only 9 months old...

I was so honored that I was chosen for this position. This particular facility in the past would only hire RT's with at least 2 years of experience on the job...I was quite flattered when my 'supervisor' stated that she would be able to train me "her" way..."the company way"...

Sometimes, you're handed "gifts" that later turn out to become "sh*t in a nice box"
I'm sorry to say that, but it sure seems that way at times...

Anyways, I took off that pin from my badge and placed the badge, a form and all 4 keys into an envelope and sealed it to place it in the HR mailbox. Walking away from HR, I looked at the pin and I thought...I didn't do very well here to make a difference...I mean, I'm sure I touched someone's life somewhere out there..but who's life did I make better, who's life did I touch? Where did I really make a difference...cause sometimes you just don't see it...

I can honestly tell you that I "had a hand in" making a difference in someone's life, but I don't think I did it solely!

I want to make a difference, I want to touch just one person's life and make it better, some how, some way...

I've always wanted to be a doctor...I'm still shooting for it...I'm hoping to enter med school in 5 years...I'll be 43 when I enter...some say that's too old to go back to school for such an intense course....but I don't believe that now, I still feel like I have quite a bit of life left and I still want to make a difference...

so, I would love to leap into the future, go forward 6 years and see how far I've come...did I pass my MCAT's? Did I score well? Was I chosen to begin a life of osteopathic medicine?

Or did I end up becoming a drunk? ...hehe...

I wish myself all the best life has to offer, I wish myself the best in everything I do and most of all, where ever I end up, I hope that I'm doing what I love and that I'm making a difference...

The Lord said, "Come, follow me!" and he also said, "Live like I've already given you what you've asked for!"

I trust in that, because in the last 5 years, he's truly shown his presence in my life..directly and matter-of-factly!

He is the way, the truth and the life...I shall follow him and have eternal life!

I will try my best to honor his wishes and to live my life the way he has intended for me to do and I will take comfort in the fact that he's laid out my life for me already and all I have to do is live for him, with him and through him!

Our God is an awesome God..He reigns!

I will make a difference!

I know that now, I'll know that 5 years from now and I probably knew that yesterday!

"May the Lord richly bless you my beloved!" Pastor J. Vernon McGee..

good night

1 comment:

  1. I once knew an ER doc who went to med school at around that age. She was great.

    And as far as making a difference, I can always tell if I made one, but I often find myself wondering whether it was a good difference or a bad difference.

    Good luck with the MCATs. I hear they're a bitch.