From the time I was 12 years old, I knew I wanted a life and career in medicine!
I could see myself using "those big medical terms" daily and I could see my life in a hospital bringing good news to my patients! I wanted to save all of my patient's lives and I wanted to experience the joy of telling my patients, "You're healed!" I was 12..I didn't understand that no matter what, you can't heal everyone! Some people don't want to be "healed", some people are happy being ill, being able to complain and being miserable...
Today, I realize the earth is full of "seekers"...
knowledge seekers, drug seekers, attention seekers, answer seekers and money seekers etc..the list goes on and on!
This week, I've had the opportunity to meet a few "seekers" and all the while trying to be a "seeker" myself!
I started my new job this week, and I must admit...I was probably a bit over-excited about that! But there's nothing wrong with excitement, and I must say, I was truly amazed with myself...most times, I doubt myself, I don't believe I can do things that I have never done before..but this week, I was quite surprised!
The first position I accepted after I graduated from Respiratory school, I knew I was there to learn stuff...see stuff and do stuff!! I hoped I would see, learn and do amazing stuff! I was excited! I was also doubtful of my abilities and my confidence was low. I didn't learn much there though...
So, I went to the next place...hoping again I was going to see, learn and do amazing stuff! I still wasn't confident...I hadn't learned much from the last place...so, I opened my brain, heart, soul and prepared myself to learn, see and do!
I learned so much, it was so exciting, yet I still lacked self-confidence...I didn't know much at the start, so I couldn't take part in initiating, implementing and suggesting therapies, protocols or anything for that matter...
It's so hard, its so hard learning to walk before you run! it's humbling, humiliating and down right defeating at times!
But, I prevailed in the sense that now, with this new position, I can offer, suggest, implement, initiate and treat! I can do that now! I'm really excited!!!!!!
I'm getting teary eyed writing this! I've come a long way in so little time, and for another time in my life, I'm proud of myself! I like what I've become and in doing that, it brings me to a whole other level of excitement! I'm still learning, and I always will learn new things, BUT, when you're excited about something, learning becomes so easy...remembering things becomes easy!
I've kinda had a rejuvenating week in that I've been able to listen to Pastor Paul every day this week and I've been able to be happy for more than 5 minutes a day and that I'm learning..I love to learn!
Life is extremely good this week! I am so very appreciative of that and I hope that this goodness will last a little while longer!
I'm very happy also to have today off of work so that I can put together and make sense of everything that happened this week!
This week, I've found some of the joys I've been "seeking"..and it feels great!
In learning from Pastor Paul this week, he's teaching about "extreme makeovers" and I've enjoyed being able to see yet again just how the Lord is transforming me into the person he wants me to be!
"Walk in the spirit, get into his word and God will give you power you've never had before!"
I'm ready for "this" new beginning for once in my life...I've started over so many times and each time I was scared and unprepared, but this time...I'm not scared, I'm excited, I'm prepared and it is time to begin the next part of my journey.
Happy Friday everyone!
kT
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